Yes, I did go there. I could not help myself. I was not going to stop until I had a man worthy vegan pizza. This is the recipe to pull out if you are getting the vegan blues.

Ingredients:

• 1 pizza shell (you can wimp out and buy one or make your own, see below)
• 1 can of plain tomato sauce
• 1/2 package vegan protein crumbles (you can cheat and use Morningstar if required)
• 1/2 package vegan sausage crumbles (same as above)
• 1 tsb liquid smoke
• 3 slices vegan cheese
• 2 tbsp soy milk
• 1 package vegan/soy shredded cheese
• 1 jar of sliced jalapeno peppers
• 4 garlic cloves minced
• 1 medium onion
• 1/2 cup water

To make the “meet” topping (yes, I am intentionally spelling it that way):

Heat two tablespoons of oil and get it HOT. Add the onions and garlic. Cook for 1 minute until brown. Add the protein and saus’ge crumbles. Cook the mixture on high heat for 2 minutes. Add the water and liquid smoke (add more smoke if desired for more man taste). Reduce heat to medium. Dice the slices of vegan cheese and place them in a microwave safe bowl with the soy milk. Heat for 45 seconds. Pull the bowl out of the microwave and mix with a fork until you have a sauce. Add the sauce to the “meet” mixture. Cook the mixture for a few more minutes at low heat until most of the moisture is gone. Remove the mixture from the heat.

Place your pizza shell on a pan. Coat it with the plain tomato sauce. Liberally (and I mean liberal) sprinkle oregano, onion powder, garlic powder, and cracked pepper on the tomato sauce. Spread the “meet” mixture over the pizza. Spread the vegan mozarella over the pizza.

Place the pizza in the oven and bake at 425. If this is a prefab pizza shell, you need to bake it for 8 – 10 minutes until golden brown. Pull the pizza out of the oven and add the peppers. Place back in the oven for 1 minute to get the peppers hot. Remove from the oven and cool on a rack for 10 minutes.

If you are using a real pizza dough shell, then bake it for 12 – 15 minutes.

Slice the pizza up, grab a beer (if you are of age), and scoff at the people who say eating vegan is eating salad.

Homemade Pizza Shell

• 2 3/4 cups bread flour
• 1 tbsp yeast
• 1 1/2 cups warm water
• 1 tsp sugar
• 1/8 tsp citric acid (vitamin C)

Put the sugar and yeast in a small cup. Add 1 cup of really hot to the touch water. Stir the mixture and let it sit for 5 minutes. After 5 minutes, it will be frothy and foamy like a head on a Guinness.

Mix all the other ingredients in a bowl. Pour the water in the bottom of your Kitchen Aid mixer with dough hook (best $100 kitchen investment). Turn the mixer on low and gradually add the dry ingredients. Pour the remaining 1/2 cup of water in a shot at a time until all ingredients are mixed. The dough should incorporate all ingredients and not stick to the bottom of the bowl. Add some flour or water to adjust until you reach this. The dough should spin 6 minutes start to finish. Pull the dough off the hook. Spray the bottom of the mixing bowl with PAM. Throw the dough back in the bowl, cover it with plastic wrap, and let it rise for 30 minutes. As always, you can help speed this process by putting the bowl on a warm stove-top by the oven vents. I preheat my oven to 200 degrees just to let the heat warm the stove.

After 30 minutes, roll the dough out onto a pizza pan and add your toppings.

Sometimes I get it right and sometimes I am completely off. Tonight was an “on” night. Marsala and shallots are a powerful combination and produce savory and sweet in the same bite. If you have been reading this blog passively looking for a vegan recipe  to try, I would wager the farm on this one. And no cholesterol to boot!

Chick’n Marsala Ingredients

• 1 Bag of Soy Delight Nuggets (or any faux chick’n product)
• 4 tbsp flour
• 4 tbsp canola oil
• 1 medium shallot diced
• 1/2 red onion sliced very thin (like paper thin)
• 1/2 cup Marsala wine
• 1 cup vegetable broth
• 1 1/2 tbsp soy sauce
• 2 tbsp nutritional yeast (adds lots of  meat and cheese flavor…without the meat and cheese)
• 1 tbsp cornstarch
• 2 tbsp water
• 4 tbsp Earth Balance margarine
• 1/4 cup chopped parsley

Spread the flour out on a plate. Dredge the soy nuggets in the flour (this means “coat them in flour”). Heat the canola oil in a large saute pan. Make sure it is HOT. Place the nuggets in the pan. They should sizzle. Cook them 2 – 3 minutes on a side until they are nice and brown. Remove from heat. Clean the saute pan out completely. Place the pan back on the stove and add two tbsp of margarine. Let it get super hot (but don’t burn it). Add the diced shallots and onions. Cook them for 1 minute. Add the marsala wine. Reduce the heat to medium and let the sauce reduce to about half. Add the vegetable stock, remaining margarine,  and soy sauce. Let it simmer for 5 minutes. Mix the cornstarch and water in a separate bowl. Whisk the mixture into the marsala sauce gradually until the sauce thickens. Remove from heat. Add the parsley and nutritional yeast. Place the soy nuggets back into the pan and coat them in the sauce. Let the nuggets warm for a couple minutes and serve with the rice.

Sherry Rice Pilaf

• 1 cup of long grain rice
• 1 medium shallot diced
• 1 1/2 cup of vegetable stock
• 1/2 sherry wine
• 4 tbsp margarine

Heat the margarine in a medium sauce pan. Add the shallots and rice. Saute them on high heat for 3 minutes. Add all the other ingredients and bring the rice to a boil. Reduce to a simmer and cover. Cook for 15 – 20 minutes.

You can plate both of these with some steamed broccoli or asparagus. This will make you a believer.

I am half Italian and born in New Jersey. Although, I somehow picked up a southern twang over the years (maybe because I have lived in the south for 10 years), I still have loyalty to New Jersey and Bruce Springsteen (gotta be from Jersey to get that one).

A very simple Italian/northeastern dish is to simply sautee up a bunch of peppers, saus’ge, onions, and some mushrooms. I did this yesterday for lunch and it was a delightful and filling meal without the associated calories and heart crushing saturated fat.

Ingredients:

• 2 tbsp grape seed oil (much better for cooking – use canola if you don’t have this)
• 1 package Tofurky Italian Saus’ge
• 1 medium onion
• 1 green pepper
• 1 handful of sliced mushrooms
• 2 tbsp of Frank’s RedHot

Heat the oil in a large skillet and get it really hot. Slice the saus’ge into decent bite sized slices. Julienne cut your onions and peppers. Add all the ingredients to the skillet. It should really sizzle. Stir constantly for 5 to 7 minutes. You will see the onions start to get slightly brown and caramelize. Remove from heat, and add the Red Hot. Stir until it is mixed.

Pour the big ‘ole pile into a bowl and turn on some Bruce Springsteen to listen to while you eat.

More spicy. More savory. More soup and less chili. All the flavor. Less the fat. Less the bloat. Less the burps. Come try part deux. Serves 4 – 6. Prep time 30 minutes.

Ingredients:

• 8 cups vegetable stock (use “Better than Bullion No Chick’n” Base)
• 2 medium diced yukon gold potatoes (they are just good for cookin’)
• 1 medium diced onion
• 4 massive minced garlic cloves
• 1 can tomato sauce
• 1 can pinto beans
• 1 can “Rotel” diced tomatoes and chili peppers
• 5 tsp chili powder
• 2 tsp cumin
• 7 diced de-nuked habanero peppers (leave this off if you are a sissy)
• 1 package of Trader Joes vegan soy chorizo
• 2 tbsp of cooking oil

Heat the oil in a stock pot. Add the potatoes, onions, and garlic. It should sizzle. Cook at high heat for 5 minutes stirring frequently (some browning is not bad). Add everything else except the vegan chorizo. Bring the pot of soup to a boil. Simmer 10 minutes. Add the vegan chorizo. Simmer an additional 5 minutes. Let the soup cool for 5 minutes before tasting. As my late mother-in-law used to say, “Let it get aquatinted”. It will take a couple minutes for the heat to come out. Wait and then add more seasoning if required. Enjoy with some tamales and bring a napkin to wipe your forehead (unless you are a sissy and ditched the habaneros…if this is the case, serve the soup on a lovely laced doily).

Just when you think it is vegan impossible. I am sipping on a bowl of this right now. I just made it. All the texture and flavor without all the calories and 30 chemical ingredients on the back of the soup can. Take a look at a classic Campbell’s Cream of Anything soup. The first ingredient ain’t cream (I have always wanted to spread some polysorbate 60 on a cracker with some fresh basil).

Feeds: 4 – 6
Total Prep Time: 40 Minutes

Dice up:

• 1 medium onion
• 2 carrots
• 2 stalks of celery
• 3 medium yukon gold potatoes (or whadevah’ potato you have)

Have on the side and ready:

• 1 can of green beans (yeah, I am sure there are food additives in this)
• 8 cups of water
• 6 – 8 tsp of vegetable bullion (or 8 cups of vegetable stock)
• 2 handfuls of fresh baby spinach
• 1 bag of non-meat chick’n pieces (like Morningstar)
• 2 tbsp chopped fresh parsley
• 1/2 tsp fresh chopped rosemary
• 1 cup of cashew cre’m (uhhh, what?)

Yes, cashew cre’m. There is your cre’m substitute (you wish I would tell you why I use ” ‘ ” in those words). It is made up of raw cashews and water (no polysorbate 60?). Raw cashews are soft, absorb water, and can be blended into a paste with the consistency of heavy cream and a slight sweet taste. Take a cup of raw cashews and soak them in water for at least 30 minutes (2 hours preferred). Pour them in a food processor with enough water to cover 1/4 inch above the nuts. Grind em’ for like 3 minutes. they will eventually turn into a white vegan cre’m.

While still contemplating this, pour 4 tbsp of oil into a soup pot and get it HOT. Dump in all your diced vegetables. Cook them on medium heat for 5 minutes. Add the 8 cups of water, bullion, green beans,  herbs and bring to a boil. Reduce to a medium boil for 10 minutes. At 10 minutes, add the chick’n and cre’m. Reduce the heat down to simmer and stir like crazy. Cook 5 more minutes at a really low temp. Add more herbs, salt, and pepper to taste. Remove soup from heat and throw in the baby spinach. Serve immediatey if you want to burn every part of your mouth. Otherwise, let it cool.

Can you taste the polysorbate 60? That’s what I thought.

There is nothing better on a cold Fall night than a big bowl of soup that serves as a meal (there are probably some things that are better, but…). This soup is vegan, healthy, hearty, and takes 30 minutes to make. There are lots of shortcuts to soup that don’t require sitting in a crock pot, subject to every passerby lickin’ and lappin’ a “just a taste”. Especially with the SWINE running around. I could have named this “Simple Healthy Swine Fall Soup” if it took 8 hours to make and you have 8 kids.

Ingredients:

• 1 medium onion diced
• 2 carrots diced (like whole carrots, not those cheating “bites”)
• 2 celery stalks diced
• big handful of sliced mushrooms
• 1 large potato diced
• 1/4 cup instant brown rice
• 8 cups water
• 6 tsp of “Better than Bouillon” vegetable stock (this matters)
• 1 cup plain soy milk
• 2 tbsp cornstarch
• 4 tbsp cooking oil
• 1/2 tsp fresh chopped rosemary
• 2 tbsp fresh chopped parsley

Heat the cooking oil in a large soup pot (like really hot). Throw in all the veggies (they should sizzle), reduce heat to medium, and stir for 5 minutes. Add the water and vegetable base. Bring to a boil and then simmer for 10 minutes. Throw in the brown rice, soy milk, parsley, and rosemary. Cook another 5 minutes. Remove about two cups of the broth and transfer it to a small pot. Get it boiling hot. Mix the cornstarch with just enough water to make it look like milk. Stirring with a whisk, pour the gradually cornstarch into the small pot. The liquid will almost turn to putty. This is good. As soon as it gets to a putty state, remove from the heat. In the larger pot, stir the soup and add the putty. Stir and stir and stir until the putty has dissolved and the soup is thicker.

Taste the soup. You want the soup to taste 75% of the flavor you want to eat it at. If it is not salty enough, add more bouillon 1 tsp at a time and make sure it is stirred (to be at 75% the edible flavor). The soup will need to cool to room temperature before you store it in the fridge. There will be some evaporation and further mixing (or “getting aquatinted” as my late mother-in-law used to say). If you salt it to taste immediately, it will taste like the Dead Sea the following day. If you plan to eat a portion of the soup immediately for a meal, then salt each portion to taste.

If you did everything right, you should have a chunky and somewhat earthy soup that compliments the smell of the autumn leaves around you…minus the SWINE.

Here is a no-nonsense throw down bowl of hearty Mexican chow. There are no limits to what you can throw into the bowl as everything goes together and the more you mix it, the better it tastes. This bowl of warm Mexican goodness is a great meal to walk into after a cold fall day.

Ingredients:

• 2 diced potatoes
• 1 diced green pepper
• 2 diced scallions
• 1/2 diced red onion
• 3 minced garlic cloves
• 1 package of silken tofu
• 1 package Trader Joes vegan soy chorizo
• 2 slices of vegan soy pepper jack cheese
• 1 tbsp soy milk
• soy sour cream
• guacamole
• hot sauce
• lime juice
• cilantro

Pour the oil into a large skillet and get it hot! Add the potatoes and garlic. They should sizzle. Cook them for 3 minutes. Add all the other vegetables and cook for an additional 5 minutes until the potatoes are soft. Add the silken tofu block and work it into the mixture. The tofu should break apart into really small chunks. Add the soy vegan chorizo (I love this stuff). Keep on stirring the mixture over high heat until it is cooked through (2 minutes). Remove from heat.

In a small bowl, break up the slices of soy pepper jack cheese and add the tbsp of soy milk. Microwave it for 30 seconds. Take it out of the microwave and whisk it with a fork. This will give you that creamy cheese sauce (vegan, of course) that you find slathered all over your traditional Mexican burrito without having it stop your heart or simply pad it on your thighs or gut (part of that weight loss deal).

Scoop the Mexican mixture into a bowl. Pour the savory melted soy cheese over it. Add a large scoop of soy sour cream and guacamole. Stir it a little until it is nice and sloppy. For kicks, squeeze some fresh lime and sprinkle some fresh chopped cilantro over the top. Get yourself a big spoon and start shoveling in this warm, healthy, filling, fall vegan meal.

This has been a favorite of ours we found pre-vegan days. I made it last night with a vegan twist. This is a great meal that gives you lots of veggies, pasta, and great lemon flavor without all the associated hassle of calories. It is a full meal that can be served with a salad and garlic bread.

Ingredients:

• 1/2 green zucchini
• 1/2 yellow zucchini
• 1 bunch asparagus tips
• 1 head of broccoli
• 1 cup of carrots
• 1/2 package whole wheat angel hair pasta
• 1/2 cup vegetable stock
• 1/2 cup white wine
• 1 tbsp cornstarch
• 1 tbsp margarine
• 1 tbsp chopped fresh parsley
• 1 tbsp chopped fresh basil
• 2 garlic cloves
• 1 pkg Light Life vegan Smart Tenders
• 2 lemons

Cut up all the vegetables on a large cutting board. We use the Pampered Chef hand slicer which makes great juliann strips of the vegetables. Dump the veggies in a bowl and mix them with oil, salt, and pepper. Put them on a cookie sheet and roast them in the oven at 400 degrees for 20 minutes.

In the meantime, boil your pasta.

In a large skillet, get 2 tbsp of oil nice and hot. Open the box of vegan smart tenders and cut them into strips. Mince the garlic cloves and mix them in with the pieces. Make sure your pan is hot! Throw in the tenders into the pot. The tenders have a nice coating on them that should brown. Cook for about 3 minutes until nice and brown. Remove from the pan.

Put the pan back on the burner and add the white wine, veggie stock, margarine, parsley, and basil. Let this cook for 3 minutes. Mix the cornstarch in a separate bowl with some water until it is all dissolved. Wisk this mixture into the cooking sauce. It should thicken immediately. Remove the pan from the heat and add back the vegan smart tenders.

Pull your roasted veggies out of the oven and drain your pasta. Start combining all ingredients in the pasta pot. Start by pouring in the tenders mixture. Add your veggies. From here, add scoops of pasta at one at a time until you get a good balance of all ingredients (some people don’t like a lot of pasta).

Finish the mixture off by squeezing 1 – 2 full lemons over it (to your taste) along with some salt and pepper. Serve in bowls (4 – 6 servings). You should have a nice, light, and satisfying pasta dish.

Folks, a vegan meal does not get any easier than this. If you have been reading this blog and have been curious about the food, the vegan red beans and rice recipe yields a great “try before you buy” meal. It is full of fiber and protein with low fat and no cholesterol (a building block for my 25 year old weight at 35). We have made this meal for all of our veganphobic friends and all have been shocked by how stinkin’ good this is.

Here are the stinkin’ ingredients (I just like saying that in a recipe):

• 1 1/2 cups of cooked rice (not sticky, like classic Uncle Ben’s)
• 1 can of red kidney beans
• 1/2 Trader Joe’s Vegan Chorizo (yeah, we love this stuff)
• 1 TBSP worchestshire sauce
• 2 TBSP liquid smoke
• 1/2 diced onion
• 1/2 diced green pepper
• Vegetable stock

Heat 2 tbsp of oil in a large skillet. Add the onion and pepper. Saute the mixture for 3 minutes. Reduce heat to a simmer. Add worchester and liquid smoke to the pan and stir into the vegetables. Add the rice, beans, and chorizo to the pan. Add vegetable stock in splash increments if it seems too dry for you liking. You may also add dabs of liquid smoke depending on how Cajun you like it. Cook the mixture on low for 3 minutes, stirring frequently.

Remove from heat and serve in bowls with some Frank’s Red Hot (accept no substitutes).

Buffalo Pizza

If you are a skeptic, this sounds like a stretch. Trust me, it isn’t. Much like Taco Bell, I find myself reusing the same ingredients and ideas in many different recipes. If you don’t know what I am talking about, read this post on my born again buffalo wings. Aleta and I just enjoyed this pizza and I even took a picture (many of you have been asking for this).

As you may or may not know, I am the village idiot of bread making. However, I have always been able to do a pizza crust. Adding my obsession with flax seed, I have created a pretty decent from scratch pizza dough. The recipe will yield two thin crust or one thick crust pizzas.

Pizza Crust:

• 1 1/2 cups of bread flour
• 1 1/4 cups of whole wheat flour
• 3 tablespoons of ground flax seed (read here why flax is a health booster)
• two minced garlic cloves
• 1 tablespoon chopped fresh parsley
• 1 1/2 cups of water
• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 tsp of sugar
• 1 1/4 tsp active dry yeast
• 1 tsp salt
• 1/8 tsp ascorbic acid (vitamin C – read here why this is helpful)

Put the sugar and yeast in a small cup. Add 1 cup of really hot to the touch water. Stir the mixture and let it sit for 5 minutes. After 5 minutes, it will be frothy and foamy like a head on a Guinness.

Mix all the other ingredients in a bowl. Pour the water in the bottom of your Kitchen Aid mixer with dough hook (best $100 kitchen investment). Turn the mixer on low and gradually add the dry ingredients. Pour the remaining 1/2 cup of water in a shot at a time until all ingredients are mixed. The dough should incorporate all ingredients and not stick to the bottom of the bowl. Add some flour or water to adjust until you reach this. The dough should spin 6 minutes start to finish. Pull the dough off the hook. Spray the bottom of the mixing bowl with PAM. Throw the dough back in the bowl, cover it with plastic wrap, and let it rise for 30 minutes. As always, you can help speed this process by putting the bowl on a warm stove-top by the oven vents. I preheat my oven to 200 degrees just to let the heat warm the stove.

In the meantime, you need to prepare the toppings. The pizza toppings consist of:

• 1/4 cup Frank’s Red Hot (accept no substitute)
• 2 tbsp of canola or grape seed oil (olive if you must)
• 1 sliced medium onion
• 1 heaping handful of sliced mushrooms
• 2 cloves of  garlic
• 5  diced boneless vegan buffalo wings
• 4 slices of soy smoked provolone cheese

Pour 2 tablespoons of oil in a saucepan and get it hot. Add the onions, mushrooms, and garlic and saute on high heat for 3 minutes. Remove the mixture from the heat. In a small bowl, combine the hot sauce with two tablespoons of oil and mix it well.

Once the dough has risen to about 50% more (does not have to double in bulk) than the original size, remove the dough from the bowl and drop onto a floured surface. I like a thin crust so I slice the dough in two portions and throw the other in the fridge (good for 7 days).

Roll the dough out on a floured surface and transfer if to a pizza pan. You may have to work on this a bit as this dough is a little more stiff than regular white flour doughs. The dough should be just about paper thin and you should get at least 12 inches out of it. Spread the hot sauce on the dough and cover it. You may have to do a couple shots from the bottle to get full coverage. Layer the sauteed onions and mushrooms over the sauce. Next, layer the chopped vegan chicken pieces.

Place the pizza (no, I did not forget the cheese) in a preheated 425 degree over for 7 1/2 minutes. After 7 1/2 minutes, pull the pizza out and add the smoked cheese. I usually break the slices into little squares and layer it all over the pizza. You want to wait to add the cheese as soy cheese will burn if you add it at the begining of the process. Place the pizza back in the oven and cook for 6 more minutes.

The pizza crust should be brown and the soy cheese should also start to tint a little brown. Remove the pizza and let it stand for a couple minutes. In the meantime, you can whip up an optional ranch dipping sauce:

• 1/2 cup soy mayo
• 1/2 cup soy sour cream
• 1 large garlic clove
• 1 tbsp of fresh parsley
• 1/2 green onion

Throw all this in a food processor and blend it to a sauce. Add onion or garlic powder to get the desired strength of the dipping sauce. If it is too thick, pour in a tablespoon of vegetable stock or soy milk.

Cut the pizza, serve it up with the cool ranch sauce, and enjoy. This pizza satisfied our itch for the Sunday afternoon slouch in front of TV meal. It has salty, spicy, pizza, and dressing all in one sitting. As always, there is ZERO, Nada, zilch cholesterol and half the fat.