Born Again Vegan

Both my boys were old enough to enjoy the foot of snow dumped on us this week. They were also old enough to NOT ENJOY getting plugged in the face with a snowball for the first time. Nothing soothes a red and snotty face like a warm bowl of my epic lime white bean vegan chili.

This is a 30 minute vegan chili/soup that is hearty and healthy that is worthy…

• 4 cans of assorted white beans
• 1 can of diced jalapeños (like the ones that are almost mush)
• 3 diced carrots
• 1 diced large onion
• 3 diced stalks of celery
• 2 diced medium potatoes
• 8 cups of vegetable broth
• 1 1/2 tsp of cumin
• 1 1/2 tsp of garlic powder
• 1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley
• 1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
• 2 limes
• 2 tbsp of olive oil

Heat the oil in a big soup pot. Add the carrots, celery, onions, and potatoes and cook them on high for 5 minutes. Add the beans, cumin, garlic powder, and vegetable stock. Bring it to a boil and let it simmer uncovered for 20 minutes. Remove the soup from the heat and throw in the parsley and cilantro. Squeeze at least the juice of one lime into the soup. Taste it. If you want it more tart, add another lime and some additional cilantro. Salt and pepper to taste.

This is a hearty man meal after shovelling a driveway or a soother for a kid who just took his first snowball in the chin.

I wretched my posterior labrum 3 years ago exercising with free weights. This in and of itself is enough for me to implore fellow dads to stop slinging weights like we used to in our 20′s. This causes very painful bicep tendinitis in my left shoulder. My most recent bout with it kept me off of any kind of upper body workout for 3 weeks. This is agonizing as there are just so many legs and core exercises a dude can do before having to buy a pair of Old Navy Yoga Butt Pants.

My doctor gave me a shot of cortisone in the shoulder joint. It was so delightful that my left leg started kicking up and down during the procedure. I asked him if if the needle was splitting every soft tissue in the joint itself during the insertion. Once the feeling of being hit in the shoulder with a sledgehammer wore off after a couple of days, I noticed moderate relief from the pain, but nothing to make me want to drop and give you 30.

So, I did a simple superfood trick instead. Blueberries and spinach are loaded with all kinds of good stuff with scientific names for anti-inflammitories. As always, Google it for yourself. I grabbed a handful of fresh baby spinach, a handful of frozen blueberries, a banana, and a cup of water and threw it in a blender. I then proceeded to slam it down. The whole process took 10 minutes and I just got 4 servings of fruits and vegetables.

By the 3rd day of drinking this stupidly simple superfood shake, I noticed a SIGNIFICANT difference in my shoulder. The tendinitis was completely gone. It was gone so much to the point that I have been able to do light upper body exercises without any issue (taking it slow).

Before I lead you to believe this was a food miracle, let’s get a few things straight. I do have steroids floating in my shoulder and I have rested it for a few weeks. So, there is not any science that proves one thing over another. I would suggest that a combination of everything with the superfood shake as the final “oomph” got me over this hump. At the very least, this is a 10 minute exercise to give you a heaping dose of superfood goodness.

Can I borrow your yoga butt pants?

Aleta and I attended a “raw food” workshop at the local (and only) Whole Foods Market. As usual, I was the only dude there that was not wearing a small T-shirt and horn-rimmed glasses, was clean shaven, and did not have product in my hair that made me look an alt-rocker (you know, that dry pomade stuff). I was thinking about carrying my Glock 19 and wearing cammo (actually, I don’t have cammo and don’t have a gun or a concealed carry permit…yet).

Eating 100% raw is pretty hard core. It makes us vegans look like health heathens. However, incorporating some decent raw foods and meals into any kind of diet can be extremely helpful. The lady doing the cooking demonstration had an amazing story of health restoration and weight loss after having chronic illness for 20 years. There are plenty of testimonies like this if you google hard enough.

She whipped up some eg’gless e’gg salad in one of her demos. I was a total skeptic until she passed out samples. Once the demo was over, I ran over to the store and bought all the ingedients. I have been eating it every day for lunch this week.

Ingredients:

• 1 medium lemon squeezed (about 1/4 to 1/2 cup)
• 3/4 cup raw macadamia nuts (soaked for 4 hours)
• 3/4 cup raw cashews (soaked for 4 hours)
• 1/4 cup diced celery
• 1/4 cup diced peppers
• 1/4 cup relish or diced pickles
• 2 diced scallions
• 1 tsp of agave nectar (or sugar)
• 3/4 tsp of tumeric (key ingredient)
• 1 chopped garlic clove (or tsp of powder)
• Salt to taste
• Water for consistency

Blend everything but the vegetables in a food processor for 5 minutes. The mixture should be very smooth and yellow by the time you are done. Add water a 1/4 cup at a time until you get your desired consistency (like how thick or thin do YOU want it). Pour the mixture into a bowl and add the veggies and mix it.

You can eat it right there or chill it for a few hours. It does get better with age. From that point on, you can basically use it on whatever you want. You can make sandwiches, celery boats, or add it to a salad. The stuff is very filling and very good for you. You are getting a ton of protein and good fats and zero cholesterol.

And you don’t have to wear horn rimmed glasses to enjoy it…

If I have learned anything from P90x, it is to respect the intensity and interval training, especially as we get older. There was a sea of new years resolution people in my local YMCA this January. They fall into two categories: walk on a treadmill (usually the ladies) or “3 sets 10″ style free weights (usually the guys).  A good 50% have already disappeared during my morning visits. Maybe their dropping is a lack of motivation or it maybe is a lack of results.

I think it is a combo of both.

You can google all day long to find out the best way to exercise. I am coming to the conclusion that as I get older, it is less about reps and “max bench” and more about wearing out both my upper and lower body. I still do the P90x plyometric and core synergistic workouts due to their intense cardio/muscular nature. I have since augmented them with a turbo kick class and a boot camp class at my local YMCA. Yes, it is usually me and 5 moms, but I have learned to respect these workouts. With a good form and focus on the core, both of these workouts will result in a sweat. In the end, I am out of breath and drenched in sweat after applying resistance to every muscle in my body. This has enabled me to stay fit after P90x without ripping connective tissue and walking like a hamster on a treadmill.

The bottom line and my encouragement to all moms and dads heading towards 40, you have to up the ante significantly. Everything we did in our 20′s just does not work like it used to. Maybe it will, but you also have to stop eating your kid’s left over PB&J crusts and Doritos. We need a good 45 minute hard cardio workout that forces all our muscles to push and pull. For dads, stop the 3 sets of max weight. That stuff was cool in our 20′s, but is now just tearing all our tendons. Instead, do 3 sets with half the weight with 15 seconds of rest. For moms, try running on the treadmill in hill intervals. You should be running until you are begging yourself to hit the “Decline” button. Also, do some push ups or do a body pump class. Everyone from Doctor Oz to the folks on the “Biggest Loser” will tell you that building lean muscle is the key.

This interval/cardio approach has revolutionized and invigorated me to stay fit. Staying fit and uninjured seems to be the key on the way to 40. I don’t want to quit.

“The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.” - Saint Bernard of Clairvaux

Home exercise programs do not work (at home). The amount of disciple required to actually do some turbo Tae-bo jazzer rock ab cruncher workout far surpasses the discipline of the person buying the workout “system” (why is everything a “system” now?). We buy home exercise programs because we saw an infomercial that convicted us of our lack of discipline. We mustered enough motivation to buy the program to cleanse us from our guilt and frustration of being undisciplined to begin with. It is the perfect “do nothing” marketing exercise and it makes millions.

I have yet to ever see a P90x infomercial. I knew that if I would ever be successful at any exercise program, I’d need to do the program at the gym. That is exactly what I did. After receiving the DVD’s, I ripped them all to MP4 using the most awesome application for such a task, Handbrake. I then imported the DVDs into iTunes and onto my iPod.

Once the content was on my iPod (for my own personal use), I read through the very informative guide in an hour or so. I then gave myself 3 days to watch the first 3 videos a few times and get familiar with the type of workouts I would be doing. Once I had a decent idea, I then set a goal to start the entire workout program on the next Monday morning. The workout requires 1.5 hours (plus or minus a few minutes to and from the gym) and at least 5 days a week (6 if you do Yoga). Pick a time that is going to work. Workout in the morning if you are a morning person. Do not try to take on P90x in the AM if you hit the snooze 10 times. Conversely, never do something in the evening if you have kids, sports, dinner, and general chaos to attend to. If you are married, cut a deal on kid and dinner chores with your spouse to allow for the time. You have to pick a time that is going to work.

I have a somewhat more flexible schedule than others and work from 9:30 – 6:30 every day from my house. Since Aleta is a stay at home mom, she does just about all kid duties in the morning. I take the kids from 6:30 PM and on during what Aleta calls “the witching hours”. I chose 7:30 – 9 AM every day as my workout, including the 5 minute ride to and from the local YMCA. I made sure to carb load with my normal protein shake at least 1 hour before the workout. You will need to eat AT LEAST 400 calories before these workouts or you will indeed run out of gas. Oatmeal, Clif Bars, and grape juice (no acid) make great sources of carbs for this kind of workout and these are normally what I eat beforehand.

Do not think for a second that you are too old or too out of shape or too injured to do this workout. I have a tear somewhere in my shoulder and I have learned to work around it, not stressing it or making it sore. I have met many people in the P90x forums in their 50′s and 60′s in great shape. I have also met people who ran out of breath on the warm-up exercises the first week and made it through P90x start to finish. There is a way to do this workout with out injuring yourself or dying in the first 10 minutes.

Just be sure to NEVER do it at your house…

I always find it funny how workout infomercials show the before and after pictures of people who have been through their program. At the bottom of those shots, there is always an asterisk that says “Results Not Typical”. That is because most of the people in those pictures were paid by the infomercial company, went on some lemongrass and water diet, and had some super-fit trainer named Holden or something to help them through the program. In addition, everyone sticks out their white pot bellies, unstylish mullet hair dos, and horribly out of style shorts for those “before” shots. The after always includes shaved excess hair, tans, makeup, and the latest Nike apparel.

Having “worked out” consistently for 15 years, I was at a standstill this winter. At 35, it had become so boring to me. In addition, my shoulder has some weird tear that doctors can’t seem to diagnose. This knocked me out of all the typical guy weight training of “3 sets of chest, shoulders and tri’s” and all the other “body builder” stuff we do. It was awesome for our twenties when we were trying to score chicks. All we do is tear connective tissue at gym in our 30′s, trying to pick up our wives.

A coworker told me about P90x. I had never heard of it before (unlike most of America). I don’t have cable and don’t watch infomercials, especially workout ones AND especially ones from that advertise “home” programs. Please, who actually works out by themself in their living room after sleeping in and with booger finger kids running around? I went to the website and bought the DVDs on my friend’s recommendation. I ignored all the before and after pictures as those are silly, like mullets.

Below are my “Before and After” pictures. I never thought I’d EVER take these pictures. It seems both vain and silly to do this. However, the P90x online community is surprisingly supportive of each other. Since I purchased a licensed and legal copy (yes, think about that for a second), I was given access to a personal online trainer. She pushed me to do the pictures and I did. So, here they are:

I will publish a few articles on how to get typical results from P90x for someone in their 30′s with kids and a busy life. It is all doable.

Yes, I did shave my chest. As for the tan, I mowed the grass all summer without a shirt. It is a redneck tan. This had more to do with the fact that I was sick of my wife and in-laws making fun of my white pasty body.

To be continued…

Quinoa is a whole grain and a whole protein. It is packed with vitamins, fiber, and protein. You can substitute it out of any rice dish and get much more healthier and balanced food with the same taste. Here is a simple recipe that I make and then eat for lunch for the next few days. You can buy this grain at Whole Foods, Trader Joes, or any other healthy food store.

• 1 cup quinoa
• 2 cans of black beans
• 6 cloves of minced garlic
• 1 large onion
• 6 cups of vegetable stock
• 1 handful of freshly chopped parsley
• 2 tbsp of oil

Rinse the quinoa (read the package, it should tell you to do this). Heat the oil in a medium pot. Get it smokin’ hot. Add the minced garlic and onions. It should sizzle. Cook both for about 1 minute. Add everything else, but the parsley. Bring to a boil and simmer for 20 minutes. Remove from heat, throw in the parsley, stir and serve (blow on ths oup first or burn your mouth).

Makes 4 serverings.

Yes, I did go there. I could not help myself. I was not going to stop until I had a man worthy vegan pizza. This is the recipe to pull out if you are getting the vegan blues.

Ingredients:

• 1 pizza shell (you can wimp out and buy one or make your own, see below)
• 1 can of plain tomato sauce
• 1/2 package vegan protein crumbles (you can cheat and use Morningstar if required)
• 1/2 package vegan sausage crumbles (same as above)
• 1 tsb liquid smoke
• 3 slices vegan cheese
• 2 tbsp soy milk
• 1 package vegan/soy shredded cheese
• 1 jar of sliced jalapeno peppers
• 4 garlic cloves minced
• 1 medium onion
• 1/2 cup water

To make the “meet” topping (yes, I am intentionally spelling it that way):

Heat two tablespoons of oil and get it HOT. Add the onions and garlic. Cook for 1 minute until brown. Add the protein and saus’ge crumbles. Cook the mixture on high heat for 2 minutes. Add the water and liquid smoke (add more smoke if desired for more man taste). Reduce heat to medium. Dice the slices of vegan cheese and place them in a microwave safe bowl with the soy milk. Heat for 45 seconds. Pull the bowl out of the microwave and mix with a fork until you have a sauce. Add the sauce to the “meet” mixture. Cook the mixture for a few more minutes at low heat until most of the moisture is gone. Remove the mixture from the heat.

Place your pizza shell on a pan. Coat it with the plain tomato sauce. Liberally (and I mean liberal) sprinkle oregano, onion powder, garlic powder, and cracked pepper on the tomato sauce. Spread the “meet” mixture over the pizza. Spread the vegan mozarella over the pizza.

Place the pizza in the oven and bake at 425. If this is a prefab pizza shell, you need to bake it for 8 – 10 minutes until golden brown. Pull the pizza out of the oven and add the peppers. Place back in the oven for 1 minute to get the peppers hot. Remove from the oven and cool on a rack for 10 minutes.

If you are using a real pizza dough shell, then bake it for 12 – 15 minutes.

Slice the pizza up, grab a beer (if you are of age), and scoff at the people who say eating vegan is eating salad.

Homemade Pizza Shell

• 2 3/4 cups bread flour
• 1 tbsp yeast
• 1 1/2 cups warm water
• 1 tsp sugar
• 1/8 tsp citric acid (vitamin C)

Put the sugar and yeast in a small cup. Add 1 cup of really hot to the touch water. Stir the mixture and let it sit for 5 minutes. After 5 minutes, it will be frothy and foamy like a head on a Guinness.

Mix all the other ingredients in a bowl. Pour the water in the bottom of your Kitchen Aid mixer with dough hook (best $100 kitchen investment). Turn the mixer on low and gradually add the dry ingredients. Pour the remaining 1/2 cup of water in a shot at a time until all ingredients are mixed. The dough should incorporate all ingredients and not stick to the bottom of the bowl. Add some flour or water to adjust until you reach this. The dough should spin 6 minutes start to finish. Pull the dough off the hook. Spray the bottom of the mixing bowl with PAM. Throw the dough back in the bowl, cover it with plastic wrap, and let it rise for 30 minutes. As always, you can help speed this process by putting the bowl on a warm stove-top by the oven vents. I preheat my oven to 200 degrees just to let the heat warm the stove.

After 30 minutes, roll the dough out onto a pizza pan and add your toppings.

Sometimes I get it right and sometimes I am completely off. Tonight was an “on” night. Marsala and shallots are a powerful combination and produce savory and sweet in the same bite. If you have been reading this blog passively looking for a vegan recipe  to try, I would wager the farm on this one. And no cholesterol to boot!

Chick’n Marsala Ingredients

• 1 Bag of Soy Delight Nuggets (or any faux chick’n product)
• 4 tbsp flour
• 4 tbsp canola oil
• 1 medium shallot diced
• 1/2 red onion sliced very thin (like paper thin)
• 1/2 cup Marsala wine
• 1 cup vegetable broth
• 1 1/2 tbsp soy sauce
• 2 tbsp nutritional yeast (adds lots of  meat and cheese flavor…without the meat and cheese)
• 1 tbsp cornstarch
• 2 tbsp water
• 4 tbsp Earth Balance margarine
• 1/4 cup chopped parsley

Spread the flour out on a plate. Dredge the soy nuggets in the flour (this means “coat them in flour”). Heat the canola oil in a large saute pan. Make sure it is HOT. Place the nuggets in the pan. They should sizzle. Cook them 2 – 3 minutes on a side until they are nice and brown. Remove from heat. Clean the saute pan out completely. Place the pan back on the stove and add two tbsp of margarine. Let it get super hot (but don’t burn it). Add the diced shallots and onions. Cook them for 1 minute. Add the marsala wine. Reduce the heat to medium and let the sauce reduce to about half. Add the vegetable stock, remaining margarine,  and soy sauce. Let it simmer for 5 minutes. Mix the cornstarch and water in a separate bowl. Whisk the mixture into the marsala sauce gradually until the sauce thickens. Remove from heat. Add the parsley and nutritional yeast. Place the soy nuggets back into the pan and coat them in the sauce. Let the nuggets warm for a couple minutes and serve with the rice.

Sherry Rice Pilaf

• 1 cup of long grain rice
• 1 medium shallot diced
• 1 1/2 cup of vegetable stock
• 1/2 sherry wine
• 4 tbsp margarine

Heat the margarine in a medium sauce pan. Add the shallots and rice. Saute them on high heat for 3 minutes. Add all the other ingredients and bring the rice to a boil. Reduce to a simmer and cover. Cook for 15 – 20 minutes.

You can plate both of these with some steamed broccoli or asparagus. This will make you a believer.

“Chin down.”

This is a phrase Aleta and I say to each other when someone is taking a picture of us. This means “make sure our fat sacks under our chins don’t show so it looks like we have a neck.” For those of us who gain weight in our cheekbones and neck, this is a perpetual challenge. Especially for guys like me who have big jawbones.

Chin down is the most critical for our annual Christmas picture inserted into those clever letters we send out. This year’s picture in our letter warranted lots of “Wow, you guys look healthy/good/young/thin.” We did not realize the difference all that much, but others did.

With that said, I’ll let the following pictures be proof of the benefits of our 6 month trek eating vegan. The first picture is from Christmas 2009 after 6 months of eating vegan. The second picture is before vegan, our meat eating days.

2009 Born Again Vegan

2008 Meat Eating Glory Days

No tricks or gimmicks or diet fads. We changed our diet to vegan and continued at our same activity and exercise levels like we always have.

We’re not so bent on chin down anymore.